When the s*** hits the fan, your response is often the ONLY thing you have control over.
Let's face it... life is hard. And when life throws you a curveball, we have a choice. We can either sit around and throw a pity party about it or you step up and knock the damn thing the hell out of the park!...
The only thing we can expect in life is for things to happen as they will, outside of our control or our plans. In some cases, that just happens to be the bottom dropping out of our world—at least one, twice, or sometimes more. Some of you, like me, will have only just started the “repair job” when it will drop out from under you again.
That’s life, I’m afraid. Curveballs are to be expected. Awful illnesses, life-threatening diseases, heart-breaking losses, messy breakups and soul-destroying divorces, wayward kids, mounting debts, bankruptcy, hating your job or losing your job, and losing your business are all part of life’s rich tapestry. I passionately believe that armed with the simple tools and strategies you will learn from the HappiMe website; you will be able to build your emotional resilience muscle to overcome ANY challenge, now and in the future.
When things are tough, remind yourself that your track record for getting through bad days so far is 100%, and that's pretty good. Your body and heart will heal, new relationships will blossom, kids will get back on track, and new jobs or careers will appear on the horizon. That’s what makes life so exciting, we never quite know what is around the corner.
Let me give you an example:
Jessica’s partner had just told her that he wanted to end the relationship. She knew things hadn’t been right for a while but was still utterly devastated. She was angry and hurt. She felt betrayed. She felt that her life was over. She felt worthless and unlovable. She spent most of her days thinking about the relationship. What had gone wrong? Was there another woman? Had he ever loved her? The more she thought about it, the worse she felt. She started to get angry. How dare he? She had wasted years of her life on him. It was all she thought about and talked about.
After months of consoling her, friends were starting to lose patience. They told her that it was time to move on. But Jessica was too busy allowing destructive thinking to rule her life. Her negative thoughts were feeding her fear, anger and sense of betrayal. Her bitterness and lack of trust made dating a no-no, and she stayed single for a long time.
Kate’s partner had just told her that he wanted to end the relationship. She knew things hadn’t been right for a while, but she was still utterly devastated. She was angry and hurt. She felt betrayed. She felt that her life was over. She felt worthless and unlovable. For the first couple of days, she couldn’t stop thinking about the relationship. What had gone wrong? Was there another woman? Had he ever loved her?
After a couple of days, she realised that allowing herself to wallow was not going to help. She understood that she needed to accept the situation and move on as best she could. She allowed herself time to grieve over the loss of the relationship but didn’t let it dominate her thoughts. She chose to think that she could get over it. She knew one day she wouldn’t feel so hurt and chose to believe that maybe there was somebody better out there for her. She acknowledged that she hadn’t been happy for a while and that the relationship should have ended sooner. She committed to being more open about her feelings in the next relationship. Within months, she was happy to start dating again.
These two women were in exactly the same situation but had two very different responses which, in turn, led to two very different outcomes.
Your responses is often the only thing you are able to control, so choose wisely.